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Nikah in Islam

The lone female in our society has no place. If she go through the proper age of married then relatives have become the target of jokes. Because of increasing age she becomes embarrassed for her family. As long as she does not get married her younger sisters are also does not get married. She becomes an obstacle without a clear stream of water can move towards their destination. You can read in this page ladkiyon ki pasand, larki ki shadi, ladkiyon ke masail, Ladkiyon ki Taleem and larki ka rishta in Urdu.

Larki ki Shadi:

Hamare Pakistani mashre mein tanha larki ko koyi moqaam hasil nahi. Agar wo shadi ki munasib umer se guzar jayien to rishtah daron key taanon aur tamaskhar ka nishana banna par ta hai. Umer barh jane ke baad wo larki apne khandan ke liye pareshani ka baish ban jati hai. Kiun keh jab tak is ki shadi na ho is waqt tak choti sisters bhi unmarriage baithi rethi hain. Wo aik aisi rokawt ban jati hai ise door kiye beghair pani ka dhara apni manzil ki taraf nahi barh sakta.

Ladkiyon ki Taleem

Beshtar parents larki ki studies complete honte hi is ki shadi kar dena zaroori kheyal karte hain lekin phir har khandan mein taaleem ki satah bhi mukhtalif hoti hai. Kisi khandan mein larki ka metric kar lena hi is key liye taalimi meraj hai jab keh doosre khandan mein larki kam se kam B.A hona zaroori hai. Aise khandanon mein B.A ka imtehan dete hi larkiyon key liye bar ki talash shuru ho jati hai. Aur garmiyon ki chuttiyan khatam hone se qabal inhein shadi key bandhan mein bandh diya jata hai.

Baaz taleem yaftah aur modern family mein larkiyon ko 21 ya 22 saal ki umer tak taaleem ke hasool ki aazadi de di jati hai lekin agar 25 saal ki umer tak bhi is ki shadi na ho sakti to parents ki raaton ki neend haram hone lagti hai. Altermodern family mein bhi larki ki shadi ka maslah bhat hassas samjha jata hai aur apni beti ki shadi se faraghat hasil karne ke baad hi wo sukh ka sans lete hain.

Hamare mulk key in areas mein jahan shadi hi larki ka moqaddar bana ya ja chukka hai, in ki parwarish qurbani key aik bakre ki manind ki jati hai. Shadi ki umer ziadah karna be kar tasawwar ki jati hai aur in ki jald se jald shadi kar dena hi parents ka maqsad hayat hota hai.

Lekin Pakistan key taaleem yaftah gharanon mein larkiyon ki shadi ki umron ki had khasi barhayi ja chuki hai. Tahum dehati elaqon mein jo hamare mulk key 75% hissah par mabni hai, larkiyon key liye taaleem ki zaroorat hi mehsoos nahi ki jati . In elaqon mein larki ka bahir kaam karna maayoob tasawwar kia jata hai. Isi liye shadi ki umer ko punchete hi parents key liye is ke sewa koi rastah nahi keh larki ki shadi kar di jaye. Shadi mein takher larki ko mazeed sust aur na karah bana deti hai aur parents ise apne oper izafi bojh samajhte hain.

Parent ki Sonch:

Parents ki daleel yeh hai keh kam umri ki shadi mein larki apne susral key mahol se jaldi motabqat paida kar leti hai. Is key elawah zaidah rishte aane ke bais sahi intekhab mein bhi aasani hoti hai. Ache rishte ke hasool ki lalach mein dehati elaqon mein amooman sher khaur bachon ki bhi engagement kardi jati hai. Baaz auqaat parents apni aulaad ki shadyan bachpan mein bhi kar dete hain. Yahan tak keh dulha dulhan ko yeh bhi maaloom nahi hota keh shadi ki rasam kia cheez hoti hai.


Larkiyon ki Shadi ki Umer:

Zamana qadeem mein hind pak key elaqon mein kam umri ki shadi ki rasam nahi thi tahum 1929 mein sarda act key naam se aik qaanon manzoor ki agia jis key tehat shadi key liye kam se kam larke ki umer 18 saal aur larki ki umer 14 saal moqarrar ki gayi. Is qaanoon key bawajood dehaton mein kam umri ki shadi ka rawaj ab bhi aam hai.

Phir bhi guzashtah kayi barson ka survey karne se andzah hota hai keh larkiyon ki shadi ki umer ka graph aahistah aahistah oper ki taraf barh raha hai. 1911 mein larkiyon ki shadi ki average age 11 saal thi jo 1961 mein barh kar 16 saal ho gayi aur mojoodah dor mein akhbarat mein shaya hone wale shadiyon key isteharat se patah chalta hai keh in larkiyon ki umer amooman 20 – 25 saal key darmiyan hoti hain.

Iqtesadi tor par taraqqi yaftah elaqon mein sahdi ki umer bhi ziadah hoti hai. Doosray mamalik se taqabil karne se andazah hota hai keh hamare mulk ki shadi ki average umer ab bhi in se kam hai. Maslan Salon mein yeh umer 16 saal hai, Malaysia mein 18 saal, UAE mein 19 saal, Philippine mein 21 saal, Thailand mein 20 saal jab keh Japan mein 23 saal hai.

Taaleem aur Shadi ka Tasawwar:

Taaleem ne shadi key bare mein aurtaon key tasawwar ko badal kar rakh dia. Aur is ansar ne shadi ki umer ko aage barahne mein sab se ziadha ahum kirdar ada kia. Ab se qabal sirf taaleem ki badolat mard ne apne aap ko hameshah aurat se bar tar samjha. Is ne chaha keh aurat is ka ahtaram kare. Is ki bartari ko tasleem kar key sayadat mand khadmah ki tarah apna sar tasleem kham karti rahe. Lekin ab aurat ko bhi andazah ho gia hai key jis taaleem ki badolat mard apne aap ko bar tar tasawwar karta tha. Is ka hasoool ab aurat ke liye bhi mumkin hai aur wo bhi taaleemi maidan mein mardon ke dosh badosh aage barh sakti hai aur in ka moqablah kar sakti hai. Chunan cha taaleem yaftah larkiyon ne shadi mein takher shuru kardi takeh wo apni salahiyaton ko uja gar kar sakein aur is baat ka taiyun kar sakein keh wo apni in salahiyaton ko kis tarah apne mofad mein baroye kar la sakti hain. Lekin is key sath hi monasib rishtah ka milna bhi mushkil se mushkil tar hota chala gia kiun keh ab larki ne bhi apni psand ka aik meyar moqarrar kar liya aur wo apne se kamtar larke ke aage sar jhukane ke liye taiyar nahi hai.

Is se qabal aurat par farz tha keh wo shohar key har hokum ki taameel kare. Is key jaiz aur najaiz ahkamat ko mane. Agar shohar rung ralyan kare to biwi ko is ka ahtesab karne ka koi haq nahi. Agar che yeh sari batein islami ahkamat key qatyi khelaf hain. Jahan aurat ko taqreeban masawi haqooq diye gaye hain, lekin jahilanah rasam o rawaj ne aurat ko mard ki khahishat ke aage be bas kar rakha hai.

Hamri taaleem maghrib se zaidah motasir hone key bais taaleem yaftah larkiyon ne bhi is ka asar qabool kia. Ab inheon ne shadi ko aurat ki ghulami se taaber karne se inkar kar dia. Taaleem ne in key zehnon ki jila bakhshi aur inhon ne shadi key liye munasib waqt key intekhab ka khood fiaslah kar liya. Shohar key intekhab mein bhi inhon ne apni marzi ko dakhal shuru kar dia. Wo aise larke sath shadi ki khahan hone lagein jis ke kheyalat in se hum aahung ho sakein. Aur wo barabri ki satah par is key sath khush o kurram zindagi basar kar sakein. Is se qabal shadi larkiyon ki sirf umer dekhi jati thi. Is baat ki bhi parwa na ki gayi keh aaya larki nafsiyati tor par bhi shadi key liye taiyar hai ya nahi.

Larkon se milne par pabandi thi. School mein azdawaji zindagi se mutalliq taleem par ab bhi pabandi hai is taleem key foqdan key bais aik larki shadi key naam se khof khaya krti thi.

Kam umri mein shadi ke bais bhat si larkiyan 16-17 saal mein hi kayi kayi bachon ki mayein ban jati hain aur apne aap ko waqt se pehle hi old tasawwar karne lagti hain. Chunancha aisi larki ya aurat key dil mein apni hum asar gheir shadi shudah larkiyon se hasad aur jalan paida hone lagti hai. Larki ki zindagi ka wo dor sunehri hota hai jab wo apne aap ko jawan samajhta huye sari zummah dariyon se aazad mehsoos kare. Lekin aisi larkiyon ki zindagi aik tragedy ban jati hai. Jinhein yeh dor dekhna naseeb na ho. Wo kisi ki sar parasti mein rehte huye achanak doosron ki sar parasti karne par majboor ho jati hain.

Mojoodah dor ka mashrati nizam aur aurton ki badalti nafsiyat donon anasir shadi ki umer ko aagay barahne mein mawnat kar rahe hain. Auraton ki taaleem mein izafah key sath yeh tasawwar bhi barhta jaye ga. Shadi key waqt larki is key liye poori tarah taiyar hogi aur ise zehni tor par qabool kare gi.

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